A retired Army colonel running for the U.S. Senate wanted to use his military title on the ballot. He was told by the secretary of state’s office that a military title can’t be used as a prefix on an Arkansas ballot. Only elective offices can be used as prefixes — “Sen. Blanche Lincoln.” The candidate said his military title was also used as a nickname, and he proposed a ballot listing of “Conrad ‘Colonel’ Reynolds.” Again, no soap. Candidates can use a nickname on the ballot, but they can’t use a professional or honorary title as a nickname. Nicknames approved for this year’s ballot include Porky, Bubba and Two.

I started thinking about political nicknames over the years. There’ve been a number of Bubbas and Buddys in the legislature and an occasional Doc. I remember a Sody (from “soda pop”) too. Maurice “Footsie” Britt served a couple of terms as lieutenant governor. A Medal of Honor winner, Britt had lost an arm in World War II, but the nickname preceded that, going back at least as far as his pre-war football-playing days. He was never called “Wingy,” as was a certain one-armed jazz trumpeter.

Advertisement

One Arkansas politician did use a physical disability as a nickname. C. G. “Crip” Hall was a longtime secretary of state. After he died, his wife ran and won as “Mrs. Crip.” I doubt we’ll see the like of that again.

“Head Lice: It’s everybody’s problem.” Should that be “Head Lice: They’re everybody’s problem”? It depends on how you read the sentence, I suppose – head lice as a condition or head lice as a bunch of bugs. I’ve never known a politician who ran as “Lousy,” although I can think of several the name would have fit.

Advertisement

Chris Barrier writes: “Every election season at least one candidate produces yard signs, billboards, etc., urging us to ‘Elect Enoch Clinch For File Clerk.’ I suppose the crafters of those materials do not have human or electronic copy checkers to eliminate needless (and incorrect) words. They should.”

Be a part of something bigger

As a reader of the Arkansas Times, you know we’re dedicated to bringing you tough, determined, and feisty journalism that holds the powerful accountable. For 50 years, we've been fighting the good fight in Little Rock and beyond – with your support, we can do even more. By becoming a subscriber or donating as little as $1 to our efforts, you'll not only have access to all of our articles, but you'll also be helping us hire more writers to expand our coverage and continue to bring important stories to light. With over 63,000 Facebook followers, 58,000 Twitter followers, 35,000 Arkansas blog followers, and 70,000 daily email blasts, it's clear that our readers value our great journalism. Join us in the fight for truth.

Previous article In the money Next article Recipe time: Possum Pie