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Where's Huck?

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Is it worse to find that Governor Huckabee is unaccountably missing or that his secretive spokesman/brother-in-law is not? U.S. Sen. Mark Pryor arrived at the Capitol thinking he had an appointment with Huckabee to discuss the federal government’s response to Hurricane Katrina. The senator said he was on a mission to find problems and fix them. Finding ’em, fixing ’em and forgetting ’em was not on Huckabee’s agenda. According to a newspaper account, “Huckabee’s whereabouts were a mystery. Gubernatorial spokesman Jim Harris wouldn’t say where Huckabee was or what he was doing. He said Huckabee was scheduled to meet with someone else somewhere in Arkansas, but he wouldn’t say where that was or who it was with.” To recap, Huckabee was off somewhere with somebody — doing something, presumably. Ordinarily, people want to know a little more than that of the governor’s activities, being as he works for them, but they and a stood-up Senator Pryor were left to speculate. Could Huckabee have been conferring with Dick Cheney in the vice president’s hideout? (It’s not in Arkansas as far as we know, but then we don’t know that it’s not either, Cheney like Huckabee believing what the taxpayers don’t know won’t hurt him.) Had President Bush commissioned the governor to search for weapons of mass destruction that Saddam Hussein might have secreted in the caves of North Arkansas? Possibly Huckabee was only engaged in his hobby, which is accepting gifts. Or maybe that brush the president fights so gallantly in Texas has been creeping up on Arkansas, and Huckabee was clearing it from Stateline Avenue. We’ll never know, apparently. Wild horses couldn’t drag it out of Harris, though they might be worth a try. n Sen. Blanche Lincoln has been working on flood relief also, and was displeased to learn last week that Arkansas had been denied federal funds to create jobs for displaced hurricane victims. Instead of aiding many states, the Bush administration divided all the available money among four — Texas ($75 million), Louisiana ($62.1 million), Mississippi ($50 million) and Alabama ($4 million). “Per capita, Arkansas has welcomed more evacuees into its communities than any state in the country,” Lincoln said, and it’s “completely inexcusable” that Arkansas was stiffed. Inexcusable, yes, but not inexplicable. Like his father, who called Arkansans “the lowest of the low” (and was applauded by such as Asa Hutchinson, more opportunist than Arkansan), the current President Bush relentlessly pursues policies harmful to Arkansas. It’s rumored that the White House has ordered a tape of the Arkansas-USC game and plans to show it at a fund-raiser for Hutchinson’s gubernatorial campaign. More on this as it develops.

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