Columns » Words

Romney mum on boson



Sacre bleu!

"A storm traveled through downtown Hot Springs earlier today and damaged the historic Malco Theater. The roof will need to be replaced, the marquis was damaged, and a large planter was blown into the brick wall of the theater."

I told them to get the marquis off the roof, especially in bad weather, but they said all the fancy French theaters have one up there. I hope he wasn't seriously injured. The planter was from St. Francis County, I understand, and was in Hot Springs to inquire about a pipeline from Lake Ouachita to irrigate his soybeans.

What hath God fraught:

"Coaches preseason poll is wrought with surprises." Mark Riley suggests the headline writer meant to use "fraught." I believe momentum is on his side.

OMG particle:

"A half-century scientific quest culminated early Wednesday as physicists announced the discovery of a new subatomic particle – one theorized to be so fundamental that without it, nothing could exist. The Higgs boson, also called the God particle, is thought to create a sort of force field that permeates the universe, imbuing everything that we can see and touch with the fundamental property known as mass."

I like the sound of it. I didn't like it when the scientists demoted Pluto to a dwarf planet, but the Higgs boson is OK by me. I'm studying ways to work it into a sentence. "Mitt Romney wasn't president when the Higgs boson was discovered," is one I'm looking at. Another is, "If Romney had spent more time on the Higgs boson and less time on outsourcing, we wouldn't have so many Americans out of work." And another: "Republicans think only rich people should have Higgs bosons."

According to the newspaper, Peter Higgs, a physicist at the University of Edinburgh, first theorized the existence of the exotic particle, in 1964. Boson is a physics term that means "any particle that obeys Bose-Einstein statistics: bosons have integral spins." Well, of course they do. I hate it when the so-called "experts" talk down to us.

Add a comment