The first clue that something was amiss, said an aide to the Arkansas firebrand, was when his staff noticed that the many “ private messages” he had posted in recent days to the Official Facebook page of Iran were not only being ignored - in most cases, they were not even being read.
“This is an outrage,” Tom Cotton cried out on the floor of the Senate on Friday. “Never before has a sitting United States senator been so insulted by a foreign power. And what is worse, in my opinion, is that the Obama administration, once notified of the situation, has not acted to defend the honor of the legislative branch of government.”
Expanding on his theme on Fox News Sunday morning, Cotton explained that, not only has he issued many challenges to Iranian officials to debate the United States Constitution, the Federalist Papers and the Declaration of Independence, but he has also offered to engage in conference calls with Iranian book clubs, so that a spirited discussion of the works of Ayn Rand can take place.
“I have also sent them links to various YouTube offerings,including Ozzie and Harriet, The Andy Griffith Show and John Wayne movies, so that they might learn about America’s Golden Age.”
But for now, Tom Cotton’s attempts at Internet diplomacy appear to have hit a brick wall. With an administration unwilling to anger Iran over the issue, and a national media slow to cover the story, Cotton may find his attempts to forge peace in an uncertain world to be doomed.
“I’m not discouraged, he says, “so often a man with a vision faces obstacles the world sets before him. But with God’s help, I can only hope that one day soon I’ll be invited to Iran, where no doubt my message will resonate with reasonable men and women, and evil will fall before us.”
But until that day comes, Tom Cotton is setting his sights once again on Grand Fenwick and Latveria, bombarding their Facebook pages with debate challenges.
Yes, for the literal minded, the above is satire
And no, I will never announce that a piece is satire before you begin reading it. I won’t treat you like you are stupid.
Quote of the Day
Frankly, Wonder Woman is psychological propaganda for the new type of woman, who, I believe, should rule the world. - William Moulton Marston, creator of the Wonder Woman comic