by Robert Bell
'LEGALLY BLONDE: THE MUSICAL'
7:30 p.m. The Public Theatre. $14-$16.
Omigod! You guys! For serious! Community Theatre of Little Rock is totes producing "Legally Blonde: The Musical" at The Public Theatre! You know, the hit musical based on the 2001 film starring Reese "Don't You Know Who I Am?" Witherspoon!
Now, maybe some of you guys out there would say that you'd rather have your ears ripped off and fed to starving wolves than have to go see a musical — any musical, really, but specifically this one. Even though maybe they've been getting hints for years now that their girlfriends really like musicals and would maybe enjoy being taken out to see one every once in a freakin' blue moon. But nooooo, that's just too much to ask. They want to stay in and get stoned and watch "Koyaanisqatsi" for the zillionth time.
But you know what? Those guys are just a bunch of cynical, insecure jerks who don't know how to enjoy anything and only know how to tear things down and make fun of stuff! Because you know, it's like, "Legally Blonde" is actually a pretty funny and smart movie no matter what the stuck-up jerkwads say! So they can just sit at home and read their Cormac McCarthy books or whatever while their girlfriend and her best friends have a girls night out and go see "Legally Blonde: The Musical" and then stay out really late and have to take a cab home and have a really good time! So there!
The show runs through July 28, Fridays and Saturdays at 7:30 p.m. and Sundays at 2 p.m.