by John Tarpley
"When I got to baggage claim, I actually walked up to the dog. I love dogs and petted Nickey, the beautiful shepherd mix, and she sat down. That indicates to the handler that I had marijuana on me. I didn't know that, I just thought that dog loved me. Then another dog came over and it sat down as well and I petted that dog too. I was thinking 'these dogs love me; they can tell I'm a dog person!'"
After paying a small fine and leaving the booking office, May then promptly slipped on a banana, stepped on a rake, ripped his pants and thought about his first head shot.